James Spader
Late Night with Conan O'Brien

New York, airdate: May 13, 2005

  Play Late Night with Conan O'Brien  (11:11 min)
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Spader: The chimp attacked them. I mean, ripped the man to shreds.
Conan: They're soulless bastards.
Spader: All they want to do is masturbate and throw feces at you.
Conan: High school was weird. It was a tough time for everybody.

Spader: You have the most fantastic hair I must tell you, I was watching backstage and you can do anything with it.

Spader: Bill and I spooning, wrapped around each other in bed, where you smell their smells. Pillow talk.

Spader: The story in LA was really frightening. Three chimps coming out - this couple had a birthday cake for their old pet chimp who also had become unruly like Michael Jackson's -
Conan: The minute you're bringing a birthday cake to your pet chimp - just stop the story right there.
Spader: *cracking up* I know, I know  - hahaha.

Conan to Quentin Tarantino, after Spader left: He smells like goulash with peppermint in it.

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